Whenever we fail in our professional or personal life, its human tendency to find someone and blame it for our failure.
For example, if I am expecting certain amount of hike/promotion in my job and if I don't get it. It’s very easy to blame company policies or manager and search for another job.
Similarly in personal relationship, people blame their marriage or spouse for their own unhappiness. They think if they change their partner, they will be happier.
If you observe, in above cases, we blame external component (i.e. Organization or family members) and try to replace with new options.
But Is there any guaranty that you will not face same issue again in future?
When we blame other, we just hiding ourselves from real issue. Blaming other gives us momentary happiness, it indulge our Self Ego. i.e., I am OK, You are not OK.
We keep blaming other and remain same person as we were before. It restricts us from evolving as better human beings.
If you retrospect honestly, you will get completely different reason behind such failures.
Most of the time reasons are our own anger, hatred, fear, selfishness or immaturity. If you dig more, you will find "Self-Ego" is centre of all these issues.
If we dissolve Self Ego - same job, business or relationships become joyful.
How to dissolve Self Ego?
To dissolve Self Ego, we need to bring service attitude in our life and charity can help us in doing that.
Whenever we do charity, we feel happy and feeling of being useful for other.
I observed people doing boot polish or cleaning the floor in Gurudwara with lot of love and affection.
But why don’t we feel same happiness while doing our job, business or house work.
If you look at actions superficially, they are same e.g. cooking. If you are doing it for poor people, it becomes charity.
And if you are doing it for your family members, it becomes routine task.
If we do our routine task with sense of doer ship i.e. I am doing job or cooking, putting so much efforts. Then that task becomes burden/boring and we get frustrated.
If you do same routine task with lot of love and affection, it will remove the sense of doer ship and action becomes effortless.
This thought blow my mind, when I was shopping with my wife last weekend.
On lighter note, how anyone can spend 2 hours to just buy 1 thing J. I got frustrated, she realized that, looked at me and said "Seva Hai" (Its Service).
Suddenly frustration replaced with laughter :)
If you change your perception, normal action becomes service.
Many people think, doing “professional job” is more prestigious and important than "Working as home maker". It’s just our perception, both tasks are equally important in marriage institution.
If you start doing all your tasks like job, daily traveling, cooking, shopping or "nourishing own child" with lot of love and affection. Your actions become effortless and it gives you satisfaction.
It makes people happy around you.
Family is our first priority, with our selfless actions we can bring happiness within family and then it can be extended in society.
When we bring service attitude in our life, we start evolving as better human being.
Keep exploring, Keep evolving :)